Interesting Items in the Proposed Health Care Bill

Second time we've borrowed from IMAO today. But this one I had to share:

The White House wants you to report misinformation about the health care bill, and even provides an e-mail address to help you do so. The problem is, no one has actually read the bill to know what is misinformation. To help, I’ve read the bill (fun read!) and here are some things actually in it. If you see any information out there conflicting these items, you’ll know to report that to the fuhrer.

INTERESTING ITEMS IN THE HEALTH CARE BILL

* A surprising number of references to the scene in the Dark Knight where the Joker blows up a hospital.

* Section on helping the elderly make end of life decisions is right next to a recipe for Soylent Green.

* Patients are to be offered and red pill and a blue pill. Any one who chooses the red bill will be declared an enemy of the state.

* The word “honkeys” appears 47 times.

* Explicit promise that everyone will get the same quality treatment as top racehorses.

* Private insurance will still be available to those who don’t mind being imprisoned without a trial.

* In particularly expensive cases, traditional care will be scrapped in favor of prayers to Loothau, the mighty unicorn of healing.

* Free treatment to anyone suffering from mental defects. Symptoms of mental defects: Not liking Obama. Treatment: Bullet to the brain.

* To ensure a “right” to health care, doctors are now slaves of the State and are considered 3/5ths a person.

* There are plans to harvest organs from perfectly healthy people and blame it on vampires.

* No matter what the symptoms, doctors must first try just treating the patient for allergies.