Oh, is it Stones you want?

THIS guy brings the Stones! Right in your fat face in 3D! He's seen it all. He's been there in the heyday of Rock and Roll when TV's were being tossed off hotel balconies. Unfortunately, most of them landed on his head.

Sit back, open a can of Fresca and let the music be your master.



Shades of this guy:

You Got the Silver

Wonderful guitar work by Ronnie. True to the original vocal by Keith. Love this tune. Always have.

It's Friday. Shall We Rock?

This song mirrors how I plan my Friday night.

Start off slow... Build it up... Break it down... Then tear the motherf*cking roof off the hizhouse! Then stop... Then tear it off again. Rise, repeat, mofo's.

I'm special. Mother says so.

Always Thought this was One of the Most Underrated Stones' Songs

Something about this song just says, summer, beer and no worries. Like any of us will ever get those three things at the same time again.



Oh, heck, here's another classic from Tattoo You

You Got the Silver

Saturday night...yes

Let's Drink to the Salt of the Earth - The Anti-Stimulus Song

Say a prayer for the common foot soldier.

Let's drink to the hard working people.

Reasons Ali Took Up Guitar #3

Back in the dark ages of my life, picking through mass graves and burned out tanks of our many battle fields, I came across a rather odd item inside the rusted remains of an old Camaro. It was a red mouth with a tongue sticking out of it. It was hanging from the rear view mirror. Thinking it was some kind of sign from Allah that my family would eat soon, I ran as fast as I could back to my small, rat infested apartment in Tikriti Al-Shidoobee. I showed it to my sister, Fatas Al-Roker.. "Fatas! Fatas!!!" I screamed, "Look what I found! Surely Allah has blessed our pathetic family! We shall eat soon!!!" She just laughed. She told me it was the logo of a famous infidel rock group called the Rolling Stones. Fatas knew a lot about music. In fact she went on to record music and become a rather big star in her own right. However it did not end well. At first she sang many, many hit songs about the glorious rise of our leader Saddam Hussein. Then, well... she became a little too aggressive. Many of her songs were critical of the regime. It all came to a head when she released the song "I kissed a Kurd, and I liked It" She was thrown in a vat of sulfuric acid for that one. I miss Fatas. She turned me on to the greatest rock and roll band in the world. This song, Love in Vain, showcases the great Mick Taylor. He has inspired me to play from the soul.

Enjoy!

I'm No Schoolboy But I Know What I Like

Stones at the LA Forum, 1975.

Bad vs. Good...An Experiment in Rock n' Roll

Exhibit #1: Linda Ronstadt and Leo Sayer performing Tumbling Dice. This would be the bad.



Exhibit #2: The Rolling Stones performing Tumbling Dice. Yeah. This is the good. From Brussels, 1973. I told you once, this is the best bootleg mankind has ever produced.

The Rolling Stones -- Brussels Affair

I thought I'd post as much of this legendary 1973 bootleg as I could. In my opinion this is the greatest rock n' roll recording that has ever surfaced.

Brown Sugar



Gimme Shelter



Tumbling Dice



Heartbreaker




Angie



Midnight Rambler



Rip This Joint



Street Fighting Man

Welcome 2009!

We start the year the same way we started this blog. Self-loathing is for dipshits! Rock n' Roll!

LATELY I FIND IT GOOD TO START MY DAY WITH THIS

For about a week now I guess. I think I'm on to something.

I Really Shouldn't Do This

But hey, I gotta do something after HowEDoThat's REM post. Deleting it just didn't seem like it was enough to wash the ghey off this blog.



But seriously...

COROLLA MAN - THE COUSIN KENNY CHRONICLES (VOL. 4)

This morning, at a red light, a man driving a Toyota Corolla stopped next to me...he had his windows down...all four of them...and was blasting Foreigner's "Urgent" over his stereo...I had my driver's side window down half way as I was smoking a cigarette...which made his little morning concert all the more annoying...Knowing the general nature of traffic lights, and the their tendency to turn green after a certain period of time, I waited patiently, anxiously awaiting my opportunity to distance myself from "Corolla Man"...green...great...I purposely drive 10 mph over the posted speed limit to ensure that I hit the next light before it turns red...poor synchronization...I still hit the red light...and in the distance, creeping up on me like a monthly car payment, that noise...once again...Foreigner..."it's urgent (urgent), urgent (urgent)...emergency"...I think to myself..."ass!"..."clown!"..."who the fuck do you think you are?"...not quite finished with my cigarette, I endure...once again waiting for the light to change...yet not as patient as the time before...but during the wait, I resolve myself to one thing...the situation at the next light will be different...somehow, some way, things will not be as before...but what?...I could put out my cigarette, half finished, and roll the window up...but these things cost good money..and I enjoy the cool tobacco refreshment...so that option is off the table...I could yell at him to "turn that noise down"...but that's bush league...in this professional part of town...Then it occurs to me...like a stroke of genius...I fumble through the console..."AC/DC"?...no...Otis Redding?...no...ah ha...got it...windows down...I pop it in...I turn it up...loud as it will go...factory speakers pushed to the brink...windows rattling...small animals fleeing...seismologists on alert...the jets are scrambled...----danananana da da dana...dananana da da dana ----"ahhhhhhh yeaaaaaaaaaa"....----...The Rolling Stones!...."Rocks Off" you Foreigner listening nancy boy!...Rocks-fucking-Off!!!!...boomp3.com. ...

I look straight ahead...I smile to myself...feeling I had already accomplished the most important thing I will accomplish all day...the light turns green...but I'm in no hurry now...but Corolla man seems to be...he drives, purposefully it seems, over the speed limit, just as I had, in an attempt to make the next light...---he does not...and slowly, like a monthly car payment, I roll up next to him..."plug in flush out and fire the fucking feed"...again I smile...my life is good.

Cousin Kenny
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