What Hope and Change Begets: Poet Calls for "No Theft Day"

I'm in. But only if we can follow it up with a no fart day. You know, to assist in the battle against global warming. From Andrei Codrescu NPR (where else?):

Let's all of us citizens take a vow to not steal for one whole day. We already have a Smoke-Free Day, a Secretary's Day, a Mother's Day, a Grandmother's Day and Valentine's Day. Let's have one more holiday: a Don't Steal Anything Day. The benefits will be immediate: There will be bumper stickers that read, "I didn't Steal Anything Today." The Hallmark cards will have their usual holiday bumper crop and, best of all, the huge flow of unfilched cash will send the economy soaring.

This holiday will only work if it is observed by big thieves, not just small fry. Cookers of books, Ponzi schemers, scrupleless traders, and accountants addicted to drugs and gambling will need to observe the day as much as petty cashiers, banking clerks, parking-meter attendants, coin-laundry collectors, slot-machine operators and traffic court judges. Not everyone will observe — just like not everyone stops smoking on Smoke-Free Day — but if enough people try, the results will be palpable.

Theft-Free Day will get better every year until we can eventually expand it to a Theft-Free Week. Imagine! A whole week during which no one steals anything. Hard to imagine, I know, but everybody used to smoke, too.