This Is Not My Monkey Wrench. . .

I am a huge fan of cars, trucks, vehicles in general, and particularly gas-guzzling, muscled-up, "speed kills" cars like this fantabulous heap of ugly junk complete with 700 cubic inches of fully-blown insanity under the hood.

What? Oh yeah, what hood?

Or any other deathtrap ride, like Nils' brother's 1955 Chevrolet sporting an all-aluminum LS-7 427 powerplant. Can you say torque?

Or, for the discerning autophile, here is something a bit more sublime, a beautifully restored and slightly modified 1951 Chevrolet Pickup. Lots of chrome and a deep and rich cherry red paint job to die for. I'd sleep on a pile of asbestos shingles for a week to have a chance to launch Sonny's pickup down the quarter mile just once.

Cars and trucks come in all shapes, sizes, configurations, models, marks and arrangements. Some are utilitarian like this example of west Texas ingenuity. I mean, who in their right mind wouldn't want to mount a shooting platform on top of a truck for some wild west automatic weapon action? Or this darling little jungle Toyota, which makes up for lost beauty with a length of rope and good tires. Or even my own little jungle truck, nothing special, no a/c, no radio, holes in the seats, but the engine, transmission, headlights, wipers and windows all worked. Just fabulous!

I touched on all of this because these are prime examples of the free minds and free markets at work and the simple freedoms we often take for granted in this country. As Congress, Obama and his administration prove over and over again, they are completely inept at managing even the most minor of bureaucracies, such as the Cash For Clunkers program, which I personally refer to as the Let's Destroy Some Perfectly Good Automobiles For No Good Reason program. This program is so poorly managed that nearly half of 425 auto dealers in New York have withdrawn from the red tape and fouled mechanics of this "stimulus" plan. Another great idea from the left-wing of our political system.

And they want to run healthcare too! No problem! And by the way, while no one was looking, President Buckethead decides to cash a check for $2 billion of our tax revenues to fund off-shore drilling in Alaska Brazil. Well, gee-wilikers Wally, ain't that just great??

Let's talk about oil for a minute. Sure, it's hard to get it, drilling impacts the environment and the carbon emitted from the internal combustion engine is probably doing harm to our planet. But, until someone comes up with a more tolerable, available, and cleaner, mass-produced, energy source we are stuck with oil. Oil is and always will be a necessary part of our industry, our transportation needs and our lifestyle.

Sure, burning gasoline is bad for the atmosphere and our health; a walk around a large metropolis proves that instantly, but are you willing to live without, say for instance, transparent tape? 3-in-one oil? Panty hose? Lifejackets? Fishing rods? Guitar strings? Just a few of the things created by the base product, crude oil. There is no useful alternative as of yet.

We won't be getting our petroleum products from windmills or lithium batteries or composted egg shells. Nay, this stuff comes from the great, green earth and why the Obama administration is spending our money for oil exploration in another country (one that doesn't particularly like us by the way) is frustrating and works against his big idea of "creating or saving" x-million jobs plus "energy independence" in the USA.

See folks, it is a sickness, a malignant narcissism of the left in this country that drives this insane and continued beatdown of the US and genuflection to others that hate our status as the only living, breathing, true democracy on the planet. Since the liberals have taken over, micromanaging everything in our daily lives, we must do our part to quell our hard left turn, whether by screaming or yelling in their faces or by the better preferred, calm, cool and collected factual conversation. It is our duty and our privilege and frankly, we are smarter than them.

If we are not able to temper these mindless champions of dopey, utopian ideas with common sense and open-market freedoms, next thing you know we'll all be riding around on Big Wheels® made of regurgitated woods chips from organic beaver cooperatives and tires made from hemp-reinforced, freeze-dried, tofu.

There are hordes of intelligent people in the United States and industry should be allowed to invent, to burn bright with marketable and useful technologies augmented by tax cuts and tax incentives for discovery of the next new energy source. Mandated lead zeppelins born from the loud echo chamber of hyperbole, extremism and incomprehensible lunacy in Washington are no solution.

We all wish to be good stewards of the environment, as long as it doesn't infringe on our God-given gift of freewill. But when government begins mandating "change" by ramming it down our tender gullets is when the keystone of this country, business and industry, will suffer. And thus, so shall we.

I leave you with this simple photograph and as always a photo is worth a thousand words.


I have three: Need equals invention.